The story of a Chap called Charlie pt3

Posted by CharlieG in 100wc | 2 Comments

With the metal covering the window he went to his room and started thinking about what he just did he then heard his mum scream in horror over the monitor Charlie grabbed his gun ran down and a man ,with a mask saying kiss me, was circling his mum with machete. He figured if he had purged once he could do it again he shot the man ” how did he get in ! ”…

2 responses to “The story of a Chap called Charlie pt3”

  1. Mrs Addleton says:

    Hi Charlie, this is a fast paced and gruesome tale and your writing conveys this excellently. Make sure you help the reader feel empathy for Charlie and his mum, perhaps describe how innocent or kind they are to contrast with the deaths. Some readers may feel that a list of mindless murders becomes a bit monotonous if it isn’t well balanced with a bit of good or reason. Keep it up Charlie, your blogs are wonderful to read.
    3 house points
    Mrs Addleton

  2. Mrs Dibben says:

    Oh dear, even with metal shutters Charlie was not safe. Your blog is action packed, however I am not a fan of stories packed with violence and death.

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