VIOLIN ELEPHANT PURPLE HAPPY PAINTED

Posted by Poppie in 100wc, Learning | Tagged | 1 Comment

There was a little boy named Marcus, he played the violin and his favourite colour is purple. One day he was at school and he painted a masterpiece and his mum and dad were so so proud him. Then the school gave him a £5 voucher to go to waterstones in town so then he can buy some books. For his achievement they went to the zoo, and guess what he saw… An elephant.. Marcus was bundled up in joy he just burst out with laughter and happy. When he got home he was still full of excitement but he was really tired and drowsy then he fell fast asleep…

One response to “VIOLIN ELEPHANT PURPLE HAPPY PAINTED”

  1. Mrs Addleton says:

    Hi Poppie,
    It was brilliant to see you write a blog that flowed so well with thoughtful vocabulary, especially the word drowsy. The only improvement would be to check the tense in the first line, it starts off in past tense (was) and then changes to the present (is). I also noticed you didn’t start any sentences with ‘so’ which was fantastic.
    2 HP
    Mrs Addleton
    And an extra HP for helping all the new bloggers!

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