Once there was a man and he was very smelly. So he woke up and looked on his phone and he went on amazon and he found someone ho were selling a bath for £100 . He thought it was a good price so he ordered the bath and he said “hello i would like to order this bath ” so 1 minute later it came . He took it of his door step and he put it in his bathroom .Then he went to fill the bath up with water and bubbles. then he took his clothes of and hopped in the bath tub.
Hi Demi, it was lovely to see you back blogging this week and you had an unbelievable number of ideas in such a short space of time. Your blog about the smelly man who urgently needed a bath was fun to read and I’m sure there are many people who would love instant delivery! You incorporated the word ‘bath’ into your blog but forgot to use the 4 other words which were orange, clumsily, fighter and danced! Remember to read your blogs back to yourself before publishing – I think you could improve this by not starting sentences with ‘so’ or ‘then’ so often.
2 house points
Mrs Addleton