a new sculpture

Posted by Charlie P in 100wc | 7 Comments

there was a sculpture built in Christchurch in new Zealand wich looks like Donald trump but made into a hand but people didn’t like it because it moves in the night and CREEPS people out !!!

in that night,the hand jumped down and crept in to peoples house and takes all there stuff and in the morning he was missing everybody was scared so they made a 911 call to the emergency service and they came all the department and they find the hand but nobody was there.

7 responses to “a new sculpture”

  1. Brian says:

    I’ve just read your blog about the hand as “a new sculpture”. You have really made it into a creepy and unusual idea and it actually does look a bit like Donald Trump. I would not have thought of that if you hadn’t said so. Makes it more interesting. Original thinking by you. Good stuff !

  2. Jusden (Team 100) says:

    Hi Charlie,

    A really nice story! You make a very interesting use out of the prompt. You start depicting a peculiar setting, a sculpture of Donald Trump based on the figure of a hand! I can relate to this as I remember watching coverage of US news showing his face, and I must say you’re not far wrong! The way you specifically name the location as Christchurch in New Zealand really makes your description believable. This really grounds the piece. Talking about peoples reaction to the figure is also important as this is something that many people can relate to and have an opinion on. The dark twist in the piece is also done really well: an ominous hand going and taking people’s stuff is really scary. This is extended by the fact that the police can’t even find the hand. Good use of grammar and punctuation also – especially your use of exclamation marks. Keep up the good work!

  3. Kate Wilson says:

    Wow Charlie – your story is “creepy”! And a but freaky! A few full stops would help the second paragraph more tense, I think.

  4. Gina Ruffcorn says:

    Hello Charlie,

    The idea of a giant, creepy hand crawling down and looting homes in the night is eerie. I wonder what makes the statue come alive and what it wants? Visualizing your plot is unnerving and spooky.
    As a way to make your writing even better, try focusing on adding descriptive words or elaborating more to give the story depth. Additional information about the hand and it’s motivations would have been wickedly interesting.

    Thank you for sharing your creativity,
    Gina Ruffcorn (Team 100, Iowa USA)

  5. Mrs Dibben says:

    Hello Charlie,

    I had to look at the prompt again having read your blog. I can definitely see a resemblance to Donald Trump, which made me laugh. Mind the idea of a giant hand sculpture coming alive and moving in the night is definitely creepy.

  6. Mrs Addleton says:

    Hello Charlie,
    I’m sure a giant hand that moves of its own accord would certainly ‘creep’ people out! I wonder how the hand gets into houses without being heard or seen and what does it do with all the things it has stolen? I think you could improve your blog by checking it through before you publish for capital letters, full stops and breaking up some of the longer sentences.
    2 house points
    Mrs Addleton

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